Jealousy is one of the powerful feelings you get to experience while being in love. There are two types of jealousy: the one born from an intense feeling of love, making you not want to share your loved one with anybody else, and the one born from insecurity, making you afraid that you will lose your loved one because you are not good enough for them.
Usually, the first type of jealousy dies down by itself as the relationship progresses, but the second type can cause you a lot of trouble, if your partner is the jealous one.
He will usually try to belittle you, make you feel insecure, unworthy, unloved, so he can keep his control over you. Here’s how this type of jealousy usually manifests.
#1. Offering you fake praise
One of the ways a jealous partner acts to protect his interest is to belittle you in front of your friends, all the while praising you in your private conversations. By this, he is trying to create a gap between you and your friends, so it would become more difficult for you to leave him for one of the friends.
#2. Downplaying your successes
Your jealous partner will make you think your successes are not that big of a deal, that it wasn’t actually all that hard to achieve them and that they don’t really matter all that much. He is trying to shake your self-confidence, to make you doubt yourself and, by that, to hold you back in the toxic relationship.
#3. Bragging with his successes
If your partner feels he is not able to downplay your successes, he will try to put his own real or imaginary successes in as good a light as possible, to make your successes pale in comparison. By doing this, he is trying to make you believe that leaving him would be a loss for you, because he is much better than you, and you would be nobody without him.
#4. Miming you
We purposefully did not use the word “imitation” because what he does is much more than that. He is actually trying to copy your way of being, with the intention of looking better in other people’s eyes, and the hope that you will be more satisfied with him. In his mind, if he does what you do, the way you do it, you will see him in a better light, because you like how you yourself normally behave.
#5. Becoming very competitive
Because of their insecurities, jealous partners will tend to overcompensate. They will become extremely competitive, and not in a friendly “competition makes us all better” way, but in the “I will walk over bodies if that’s what it takes to get there” way. Their attitude towards others, especially towards their perceived “competitors” will be mostly negative, and they will always act as sore losers.
#6. Enjoying your failures
For jealous boyfriends or husbands, any failure you suffer is just another indication that you are not actually better than them, that you have no reason to leave them, so they rejoice in it. They will obviously not tell it to your face, but inside, your failures are their successes.
#7. Gossiping about you
A partner should always have your back, protecting you from gossip and rumors, right? Well, if you have a jealous partner, he will not only not have your back, but will be extremely proficient at inflating the gossip about you. He will do all he can to distort and belittle your image in other people’s eyes.
#8. Reaching the point where they hate you
If your relationship with the jealous partner goes on for a while, he might start feeling hateful towards you, as a reflection of his subconscious hatred for himself. When the relationship reaches this point, it usually ends, and it usually does not end well. So, beware of jealousy!
READ MORE: 4 female behaviors that men just love
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