A recent trend has taken over the debate in relationship therapy everywhere: women have started complaining about the spark of passion missing from their otherwise solid relationships. According to recent studies, the level of the female libido (that is, the women’s desire) starts to diminish after one to four years of being in a monogamous relationship.
Although we think that trust and communication are the cornerstones of a healthy relationship, it turns out that the feeling of security and safety brought on by emotional closeness is actually dousing the fire of passion. In the end, a healthy relationship seems to be maintained by the right balance between passion and stability.
When you feel the fire lose its intensity, you can resort to a few tricks to keep it alive, while also strengthening your status as a couple.
#1. Try experiencing new things together
And, by together, we mean you and your man, not the whole family. Leave the kids with a reliable babysitter and go out, get some “us” time. This way, you will be able to rediscover your significant other in the light you’ve seen him at the beginning of your relationship.
#2. Avoid using cute pet names
Avoid using cute pet names for each other, for this will turn your partner into something else than a lover in your mind. Don’t forget to actually let your partner know how hot, desirable, sexy he is.
Kissing on the mouth and French-kissing are important both during sex and in normal day to day life. You might not notice, but, as the relationship progresses, kisses on the mouth tend to become a rarity.
#4. Having separate bathrooms is a good thing
But, if you use the same bathroom, try and do it one at a time, especially for body maintenance purposes like teeth brushing or grooming. The only situation when you should definitely use the bathroom together is when you take a candle-lit bath or have sex in the shower (or anywhere else in the bathroom, for that matter).
#5. Unless you want to strip for your lover, try to get dressed or undressed in private
This way, you can keep some mystery and rekindle some of that desire. Also, pay attention to what you wear, at least part of the time. If you only wear comfortable clothes that are not hot at all, or even look worn and torn, you run the risk of completely extinguishing even the last kindling of desire.
#6. Don’t forget about date night and get there separately
Remember how excited you felt when the two of you weren’t living together and you were preparing to go out to a restaurant with him?
#7. For those who can afford it, hiring a house-cleaning service is a must
Think of how good it would feel to spend your Saturday morning in bed, instead of being up in arms about who will clean the house over the weekend.
#8. Maintain some healthy boundaries with your own family and the in-laws
Maintaining some healthy boundaries with your own family and the in-laws is something you should not only seriously consider, but also put in practice as soon as possible. Otherwise, you run the risk of becoming siblings instead of lovers. Ewww, gross, right?
#9. From time to time, have sex instead of making love
Just have at each other, primal style, no other thoughts or worries. The only thing you should focus on is devouring your partner with all your senses. Share a sexual fantasy! Go wild for a bit!
#10. Don’t stop grooming yourself, even if you don’t think it matters anymore
We’ll tell you a secret: it does! The way you appear in front of your man will determine how he thinks of you, even subconsciously. So, if you want him to think of you as his sexy bombshell lover, take care of yourself and don’t hesitate to wear something provocative. It will help you both.
We at BetterMe want everyone to know and experience true love. It is out there for everyone and until it knocks on your door we are here to remind you that you deserve the best love!
You can help us spread this love by sharing this with those around you and letting us know what you think in the comments below.