A narcissist is a person who favors themselves in any situation, completely ignoring anyone and anything else. Narcissistic behavior is officially recognized as a mental condition and being in a relationship with a person suffering from narcissistic personality disorder is not something to be taken lightly.
Exactly because they put themselves in front of anything or anyone else, narcissists can be quite difficult to spot, especially for a more naïve woman. Here are the most obvious signs to look for when trying to figure out if your date is or isn’t a narcissist.
#1. He constantly talks about himself
When every phrase in a conversation somehow becomes about him, how cool he is, how much he’s already achieved and how he is the best guy for any girl out there, you can be certain that you are dealing with a narcissist.
You will not be able to draw him into a conversation which doesn’t allow him to dominate or put him in a good light, so the only thing you can do is let him go on spouting odes to himself.
#2. He is quite charming, confident and romantic
Don’t be fooled. He is only trying to put himself in a good light in your eyes, so it will become easier for him to conquer you later. But beware! After he’s achieved his goal (which is usually to have sex with you and maybe, just maybe, to make you really like him), he will lose interest. Sounds sad, but this is what true narcissists do.
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#3. He loves being “different”
Because he thinks so highly of himself, he also considers he is above any rule and regulation. If you notice him speeding, parking in illegal spots, cutting in lines and breaking appointments all the time, you should know he is a narcissist. Don’t try to make him understand that he is wrong in doing all those things. He will pretend to listen, but will not change anything in his behavior.
#4. He disregards your feelings completely
He not only disregards your feelings, but anyone else’s feelings in general. In his mind, you only exist to cater to his every need and whim. He might even imagine that you don’t have any needs, so he would not feel guilty about not fulfilling them. Don’t kid yourself. Don’t stick around to see if he wakes up to realize that you have needs and wants too. He is mentally incapable of doing that, and will just keep on doing what he has always been doing – putting himself on a pedestal.
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#5. He constantly violates your boundaries
It is not a bad thing to be challenged from time to time to do the things you would not normally do. But there is a difference between that and being coerced into doing things opposite to what you actually want to do. Also, attempts to overturn your personal decisions are a glaring sign that your partner is a narcissist.
#6. He acts entitled all the time
When on a date, try to look at how he treats your servers. If he is ordering them around like a king, or is constantly picking on them, or treats them like dirt, those are all sure signs that he is a narcissist. The reason for his behavior is very simple: he sees himself as a VIP. All others should bow in front of him and cater to his each and every whim.
#7. He wants to control you
If you are feeling like a puppet in your relationship, if he is the one making all the decisions concerning both of you, even your personal decisions, he is clearly a narcissist. As an experiment, try to disobey him or make decisions without him. You will see his true face when he realizes he’s lost control for even a nanosecond.
#8. He does not commit to you as he expects you to commit to him
There is a difference between male commitment issues and what a narcissist does. A narcissist will expect you to worship them, but won’t give a second thought to your needs. That happens because a narcissist wants people around him to be constantly amazed by his grand life, and that won’t happen if he commits to only little old you. He is with you only until he finds his next victim he can exert his tyranny over.
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