If the pain from your last failed relationship is keeping you from moving on, know that you are not alone. Breakups are hard and difficult to navigate, because they hurt so much. Nevertheless, if you want to take control of your life and learn to love again, we suggest you start by looking inside and becoming stronger.
#1. Focus on what went wrong
We know it’s better not to look back on your failures at all but, sometimes, the past can help us learn from our mistakes, to prepare us for the future. Regarding your previous relationships, this approach works only if you don’t idealize them. Instead of remembering all the good things, focus on the bad, on the ugly. Your relationship failed for a reason. Remember what that reason was.
#2. Focus on your future
Don’t get trapped in the past. You’ve got to move on if you ever want to be happy. So, make plans, set some goals and give yourself something to look forward to.
#3. Cut down on your contact with the ex
If you find that it’s too difficult to cut all ties with your ex immediately after the breakup, we suggest you do it gradually. It is important that you do it, though. You cannot move on to the next relationship if you keep hanging on to the past (maybe even fostering hope that you’ll get back together). Muster the courage to break things off for good.
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#4. Forgive and forget
It doesn’t matter whose fault it was. What matters is that it’s done. Resenting your ex or yourself for the things that went wrong will only keep you tied to the past, unable to continue your journey. In addition, you’ll fuel the pain for months to come.
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#5. Smile because it happened
No matter how painful or troubling a past experience is, you should find the strength to appreciate the effect that it’s had on you. Smile knowing that you’re stronger and braver because of it.
#6. Embrace being single
The idea of being single scares many women, but that is because they don’t focus on the positive. Think of all the money you can save, the feeling of independence, the freedom of choice. All these things come from having to fend for yourself and, if you get past the fear, being single can be a great time in your life.
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We at BetterMe want everyone to know and experience true love. It is out there for everyone and until it knocks on your door we are here to remind you that you deserve the best love!
You can help us spread this love by sharing this with those around you and letting us know what you think in the comments below.